Do you ever go to bed at night or wake up some mornings with tons of random thoughts running through your mind? I’m sure you’ve experienced your “mind racing” at some point but what about when your mind is racing with negative thoughts? Thoughts like “Ugh I hate my life or I hate my job, I was stupid for doing that, I’m so fat, etc.” Ever had one thought send you on a downward spiral of negative thinking? Next thing you know you’re having a whole conversation internally highlighting all the negative or undesirable things about your life. Even if you know in your heart what you are telling yourself is NOT true, the mind is so tricky and powerful it will still try to convince you otherwise.
That is why it’s so important to tame your mind and thoughts! A few years ago, after I graduated college and before I started yoga, I had a lot of negative self-talk going on in my head. During that time I was really unhappy, slightly angry, and borderline depressed. This was before I started my blog and my business, that negative self-talk I had delayed the process of me even starting my website and blog because it turned into fear and doubt that I could even do anything successfully! smh
So how do I silence my inner critic?? 1 word. Meditation.
Most of my sadness and frustrations stemmed from me having this picture in my head of how my life was supposed to be and go. Things weren’t going the way I envisioned and it discouraged me. Another reason I was so unhappy is because I always had thoughts of comparison and perfectionism. In this digital age, it’s so easy to pick up your phone and scroll through someone else’s life that seems perfect… So perfect that you wonder why can’t my shit be that perfect? Why can’t I vacation like that??? Why can’t I have a job like that?
Back then I felt so empty on the inside, however even with this dark cloud that seemed to be over me I always searched (and still do) for ways to heal myself. I knew that no matter how I felt on the inside NO ONE OR NOTHING would ever make me truly happy.. I knew happy was a “state of mind” I had to decide to be in. I kept looking for ways to heal myself and that is when I got into deep breathing and meditation and ohhh man what an AMAZING feeling it is to meditate and elevate. Controlled mindful breathing is the only way to check in with your restless or subconscious mind.
Until you learn to tame your mind, you will not have peace of mind.
Through meditation I learned a lot about myself but I also learned how to quiet that little negative voice in my head. I learned to look at the success of others not with jealousy, envy or a feeling of defeat but with motivation! Social media is cool to me because it’s just like a big ass field of never ending inspiration (if you follow the right people). You can get on your phone or computer and literally scroll through someone else’s life! However, you simply can’t compare yourself to that person, because you only know what they’ve decided to show. No one thinks “ohh I’m having a breakdown on my bathroom floor let me take a selfie and post this real quick” lol but that’s the real shit people may go through you won’t see. That is why social media is all perception, it’s what you make it to be.
The more you meditate, sit quietly, and ask yourself questions the more you find out about yourself. I had to let go of previous ideas of how my life and career was supposed to go and accept that I’m writing my OWN book. My life story will never be the same as someone else’s. It was kind of hard for me to accept the present circumstances and be happy and grateful during my personal storm, but I keep ENCOURAGING MYSELF. Which is also a gospel song that inspired this blog post! Lol Encourage Yourself by Donald Lawrence. I don’t look to other people, to social media posts or tweets, not even friends, for encouragement because at the end of the day sometimes you just have to encourage your damn self! lol Especially in the world of being an artist, a designer, entrepreneur, singer, actor, stylist, just an overall creative person you may experience self- doubt but you won’t dwell there, you will overcome it and end up speaking victory over yourself! NEVER give up on yourself! Keep cheering even if it’s just you cheering for yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself you can do it! Pat yourself on the back! Show up for yourself!!!!
It’s 2017 the first month of the year is almost over! Quit having negative self- talk with yourself this year! You’ve heard the phrase “change your thinking change your life” or “what you think you become.” Negative thinking only leads to stress, depression, anxiety, doubt, and fear. It is not too late to make the decision to be happy, to heal, to let go, to move on, or to just simply live! There are so many activities that can help you on the road to cultivating positive thoughts and thus, a positive life. Things like meditation (of course), yoga, dance, group fitness, church, book club, volunteering, anything you feel that gives your body, mind, and breath a happy feeling. Change your activities, change your thoughts, and finally your behaviors will change.
Your mind and thoughts are powerful, if you don’t control them they will control you!! Once you learn to control your mind, body, AND your breath then you will have reached inner peace. You will turn all those negative thoughts into positive ones. Sit in a quiet place, with your eyes closed for about 5-10 minutes if you have never meditated before, and just deeply breathe through your nose. While your breathing feel free to encourage yourself and tell yourself some positive things like “I am beautiful, worthy, and content at this present moment. The present moment is a gift and I am grateful to have breath!” NAMASTE.